Sunday, April 19, 2009

Capital T-h-e-o-r-y

I decided that for my final semester of academia, it was time I take on the monster. I'm using Homi Bhabha for one of my papers. Well, it's a bit easier than I thought it would be. In fact, I'm beginning to think that using a theorist to make your argument or structure your essay can actually be something of a cop out. You see once I got through applying Bhabha's theory of the stereotype to sexuality in a single scene of a novel, I had 1000 words. Unlike last semester, in which I structured an entire essay with my own thought and literally sweated over the creative form, I have next to no anxiety over how this paper will work. I am parroting the thoughts of a terribly authoritative person (in the small and lucrative realm of the academy of course), and who can possibly argue against Bhabha?; but now I have no space to make my own creative argument. 

My findings: theory is frightened of failure and uncreative. Academia is... not for me?

This passage from Pauline Melville's story 'The President's Exile' seems appropriate:

"This is remarkably like an essay from one of the current third-year students that I marked last year" ....
Naturally he feigned surprise and looked mystified, although he had, in fact, copied the essay from the student whose effort had been marked with an alpha plus. His own work was of a reasonably high standard but it was the certainty of obtaining the best grade that he had been unable to resist.

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